A Play ~ Trusting the universal Divine

Watching my daughter's school (performing arts school) production today, was AMAZING! Shakespeare's 'A Comedy of Errors' meets Bollywood~musical. They knocked my socks off!

Throughout the first act (I felt almost in a trance)...it/they/spirit, conjured a spiritual experience. Ideas were flying and flowing about these concepts: the use and allowing of space~timing and physical spacial awareness, the movements and stillness placings and the varying resonances (especially of one actor). It was an exercise of quantum mechanics/physics and creativity that flowed...like source (itself) was speaking through/to... Spectacular and beyond words. I began thinking of returning to school to get another degree~education/theater, that I could use these 'knowings~learnings' to share this... WoW!

Thank you Mrs. Ogden, director extraordinaire (@ Houston's High School for Performing and Visual Arts) and the magnificent cast, crew and support team... So grateful, am I, that thes magnificently talented, unique children have you all...and a place to Be themselves, freely.

All true teachers and supporting staff, around the world, are such heroes, to me.

I even considered, returning to school to apply all of this, for sharing with our, infinitely illuminating, new generations.

Well, afterwards, my daughter's best friend, another amazingly splendid, light-filled young lady (beyond words) asked if I would work with her on some of her monologue work, for upcoming college auditions.

This is...this life...this dreaming~creating~dancing~seeing and Being... It was awesome to see 'teaching', through my spirit's eye...watch my mind, trying to organize and intellectualize it...then watch again...being co-created/manifesting, With spirit and another blessed being. Reminding to leave 'space'...allowing the universe to flow with/through us, often takes care of the details. :-)

THANK YOU ALL~LOVE~LIGHT~THANK YOU~THANK YOU~THANK YOU~THANK YOU~

Love and Light Joy Blessings EvEryONE~ :-)


AyAnnA K

 

Accepting~Re-membering, Human~Sacred ~Love

Releasing the Human Pain Body

Recently, I had a very interesting experience while using self healing tools, I was taught. With a method of soul healing, uses fractal theory to discover patterns of repetitive behaviors (stemming from root or initially strong emotional experiences), it includes forgiveness and embracing positive alternative thought patterns to integrate to wholeness.

There were several experiences, emotional keys (when something from the present, unlocks something from the past), which brought up emotions and something huge, to my attention. For me, most of this life has been in pain.

After a bit of insight, I began a process of forgiving a past (11 years ago) relationship's pain.

Moving through this process, which was emotional, other insights and deeper emotions began to surface.



With an "Aha!" realization, I began seeing this pattern: seeking pain and then, wanting release and escape (throughout time, it seemed to be there). I realized that, within myself there had been this acting and re-acting. Playing and rewinding the ‘pain...no pain’ scenario, over and over again, perhaps unconsciously hoping for it to end differently.


Humanity, as a whole, seems to be seeking, to escape this cycle. Have we been here, instinctively ‘living with’ and repeating, that which isn’t working (so that we may heal and get past it) ? Many times, I can remember myself, listening to a song, remembering an accompanying experience and the feelings that went with it. Though the experiences were gone, the ‘remembering’ of that feeling with the song, carried a teddy bear like quality and it was ‘comforting pain’...familiar.



At the same time, there was a reaching outwards to something...anything to soothe this pain.

{Now I believe it is a deep inner knowing, that something else...better, is possible.}



There are variable ways, in which, we humans attempt to lose our pain, by losing presence:

Overindulgence of pleasure varieties: TV and media, food, drug, etc.

Abuse: relationship choices, self mutilation and deprecation

Identity hide-n-seek: relationship self dissolving, defining self with titles, constant accomplishment seeking~martyrdom


Cycles of pain and ‘seeking no pain’ have such variety and the combinations...so many. How creative we are!



It seems that there’s a desperate attempt to live (reaching for the emotional resonances, we know) and then an attempt to not be there (seeking soothing). It almost has a resonance of most human births, I’ve witnessed.

Being born, a child/mother’s struggle to birth~being, often crying for the release and then...the soothing~loving.


Could this life, be humanity’s attempt, to eradicate man's, genetically encoded, instinct: to place survival above all else? To finally learn, how to reach a balance between being and loving...  Living, seeking...living, seeking...  







I remember deciding, as a little girl, listening to and feeling various conflict (and ages ago, in time), to choose love first. In dreams, I see myself (different, yet me) pledging to place love (what I thought was love~personality based love) before basic survival, in an attempt to avoid a life without love.


The missing link here, is that I felt a need to choose. And where was joy?


Ah~  Aha!





Bit by bit, as I felt wilted by pain, passion, energy and joy seemed to seep away. Survival was calling me and I was calling love, believing them to be separately possible.

What to do?  What did I do?


Disappear...   Be here and disappear...and the little girl, went about years of ‘pain and no pain’, knowing that, somewhere deep inside, there was something better.



During the healing experience, I felt relatives and ancestors (vast amounts), who’d suffered lives of emptiness, in attempts to "survive no matter what".
Recognizing the many ways, in which the heart/emotional body "shields itself" after painful experiences, opened me to really thinking.

Could it be, that this erasure of passion and purposing, due to the need to "survive", has lead to a DNA structure re-configuring, as with other species’ evolution, proven scientifically. Could our emotional genetic codes re-wire too...were they ever pristine? Below the DNA, energetically speaking, on a quantum physical level, all exists and is possible. Perhaps there, exist that deep, inner knowing, that all is possible, that keeps our human race going, despite pain~a Divine essence~who we truly are.

This feels true~
With this truth revealed, we can be reborn, to ourselves, to our original wholeness, living life with joy and love intertwining.

I'm feeling, that many those of us here, are being awakened to the belief that this life, with ever increasing love, is possible. Perhaps, it is our soul's destiny and human right, gifted from the divine.



We, human beings, are hearing a call, to a deep soul remembrance, of our true nature.


Innately, we are re-striving towards harmony, within and without. Purpose is calling to each of us, from within, it would seem, as a source...dare I say, Divine.



Experiences are resounding "yes!". With it, there is a releasing of fear, on an instinctual level and an acceptance and claiming of  Love, with "wholeness capabilities"; health and flowing positivity, in all areas.



Many scientists and spirituals have shared similar ideas and expanding research platforms, which intellectually, I've agreed with; now witnessed, through experience, are real and true.


Our feeling and seeing the capabilities, are exponentially renewing  beliefs in our, 'Humanity's Divine Re~membering'.

AyAnnA K

~Playing in Squishy Sand~

~Playing in Squishy Sand~

Growing up, throughout my childhood, my favorite place was the beach. Feeling the breeze flying, was heaven; smelling the salt air and hearing the sea gulls squawking...some of my favorite days.

Today, wherever I am, I can still see and feel that squishy sand, right at the shore line. The malleable sand that, wet as mud, would be firm some moments, and liquid at others. A wonderful thing with this type of sand, was that it could be used for designs and creating. I  remember dripping and drizzling it on ourselves, as we watched the patterns flow, creating body art designs all over.

Remembering moving forward a bit, placing my 'little girl feet', in this amazing ooze, of liquid sand,( pushing, wiggling them until the sand was above my ankles) is as close a memory, as yesterday.

The coolness, beneath the surface, wet and firm at the same time, supporting me each time.

That is the feeling of these days. So much has been changing for many, with such quickness, becoming accustomed to it has taken on a variety of faces and responses; we humans are so varied in thought, creation and action...it is a spectacular spectrum~our rainbow~humanity. These are those times, for drizzling and designing our days.

Though at initial glance, it may look messy, with practice our sand castles (that are our lives) become palaces of reflection, from/with the Divine.

As we twist or turn in our lives, imagine each of us as a star or a diamond. Every swivel is a new way of refracting the light, into and through the jewel, of yourself. A unique sparkling and light dance, resulting, each and every time.

Ah~

Let's Dance~Let's, in BEing, Sparkle~

Blessings~Light Love and joy to each of you~

AyAnna K